THE CALENDAR IS GONE TO BED... (OR PRINT...I THINK....)
IT STARTS WITH JANUARY.AND WANDA...THE JACK RUSSEL
"WANDA... COME HERE"
"OHAHUMANHASCALLEDMYNAMEIGETEXCITEDWHENANYONECALLSMYNAMEITISSUCHANICESOUNDTOOTHATMEANSICAN THEN RUNOVERANDJUMPINTHEIRLAPANDWAGMYTAILATTHERESTOFTHEWORLD. "
"NOW JUST STAND THERE"
"IAMSOHAPPYTOSTANDTHEREBUTICANALSOJUSTSTANDONTHREEFEET"
"WANDA PUT THAT FOOT DOWN"
"HOWCANIPUTTHATFOOTDOWNWHENIAMSUREISAWACHIPMUNKDARTINTOTHATHOLEANDTHEREISSSOMEONE OVERTHEREI HAVENOTSEEN BEFOREANDMUSTTALKTOANDWHYMUSTIHAVE4FEETONTHEGROUNDWHENICANSTANDVERYNICELYWITH3BUTAS SOONASYOUSAYTHEMAGICWORDOF "OK " IWILLZOOMAROUNDTOTHATNEWPESONANDTHENJUMPINSOMEONESLAPANDRELAX"
"WANDA DON'T TURN AROUND"
"IJUSTHADTOTURNAROUNDANDSEEWHOTHATDOGWASBEHINDMESEEINGASHEIS20TIMESMYSIZEI ANTTOBESUREICANSTIL WHIP HIMOHITISONLYADANEANDIKNOWICANBOSSTHEM.AROUNDDIDYOUWANTMYTAILUPORDOWNICANWAGITSIDEDTOSIDEIAMSOHAPPPYTOBEHERECHECKINGOUTTHESECURITYOFTHEPLACE ANDICANTELLTHATTHENEED FOR MY SERVICESISGREATBECAUSE IAMSURETHEREAREALSOSQUIRRELSAROUNDLETMEATHIM."
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IT WAS SUCH A RELEIF TO GET TO DECEMBER WITH THE DANES-- GOTTA LOVE 'EM....
"OSCAR .. COME HERE"
"WHY"
"WE NEED TO HAVE YOU JUST SIT THERE"
"OK"
"NOW HOLD STILL WHILE I PUT THIS ON YOU"
"PEOPLE ARE WIERD"
"NOW OSCAR... JUST STAY THERE"
" WHO'S MOVING? "
"STAY"
"WHEN'S DINNER?"
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AND THEN THE TREMENDOUSLY TALENTED CALENDAR CREW WHO HAVE A TERRIBLY DEBILITATING AFFLICTION CALLED "PERFECTION"
"NO, IT'S--'FOR' --, NOT-- 'TO' "
"THAT WORD DOESN'T 'FEEL' RIGHT"
TO WILLIAM IN THE MIDDLE OF A VIRTUAL FOREST... "CAN WE GO LOOK AT ANOTHER TREE?"
BUT BY ALL RUMORS... WE MADE IT LAST NIGHT AMID AOL BEING NEARLY DOWN BECAUSE RIGHT AT OUR 6PM DEADLINE GOOGLE GOT INVOLVED WITH REBOOTING AOL ( APPARENTLY) AND SENDING FILES GOT ... IN A WORD.. LOUSY !
AND-- SO HEL.P ME.... MY CELL PHONE WOULD NOT CALL ANNE'S PHONE.. . HER PHONE RIGHT NEXT TO HER
WAS NOT RECOGNIZING INCOMMING CALLS ( AND YES SHE/WE... DID CHECK ALL THE BUTTONS) NOR WOULD IT CALL ME... SO I SAT HERE WITH BUD-- ANNE AT HER HOUSE WAITING FOR ME TO SEND THE LAST PAGE FOR HER TO LOOK OVER -- MY COMPUTER WASN'T SENDING THE FILE.... THE PHONE WOULD NOT WORK.. COMMUNICATION WAS IMPOSSIBLE--
MAKES ME UNDERSTAND WHY ... IN LONDON WHEN THEY HAVE TO SHIP EYE CORNEAS BETWEEN HOSPITALS BEWEEN DONOR AND PATIENT, THEY USE CARRIER PIGEONS... AT LEAST THEY ...DID....I DUNNO NOW..... THERE IS A LESSON THERE.
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THE DEAL ON THE CALENDAR IS ----IF WE GET IT TO TH E PRINTER BY FRIDAY WE WILL HAVE IT DELIVERED BY DEC 1ST-- I HAVE NO IDEA WHO THE PRINTER EVEN IS.... LET ALONE THINGS LIKE WILLIAM CHECKING THE COLORS OR WHETHER FEB HAS 28 DAYS...
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WHAT DID I LEARN?----NEXT YEAR---- WE WILL DO IT WITH THE NATIVE AMERICAN PHILOSOPHY OF "ONLY THE GODS DO EVERYTHING RIGHT-- ANYTHING WE DO MUST HAVE AT LEAST ONE IMPERFECTION SO AS NOT TO ANGER THE GODS."
AND
NEXT YEAR WE WILL HAVE IT DONE BY DOGFEST... ( OCTOBER)
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IT IS TOUGH TO COME UP WITH CREATIVE IDEAS... THIS IS OUR 5TH YEAR??? AND EACH ONE HAS BEEN EXCEPTIONAL- ..AS THERE ARE SOOOOO MANY PEOPLE INVOLVED WHEN YOU FIGURE IN --PEOPLE'S HOUSES --MEGAN'S STAMINA-- DEVLIN'S DIMINUTIVE SIZE--KITTY'S DETERMINATION- ANNES ENGLISH-FROM FIRE DEPARTMENTS TO SCHOOL PRINCIPALS-- THERE ARE SOOOO MANY WHO HAVE COOPERATED...SOOOO MANY WHO JUST DON'T QUIT....
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SO AT $20 PLUS $5 IF WE HAVE TO MAIL IT IT WILL AGAIN BE A GREAT CHRISTMAS GIFT - WE SHOULD GET IT FROM TH EPRINTER ON DEC 1st.
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PURINA FOOD--- A HUGE DEAL IN OUR LIVES- BOTH MONETARILY AND JUST BULK........ AND GOLDIE-- OUR GHOST-- WAS RIGHT IN THERE WORKING HARD...--
THE ORDER ( DONATION) USUALLY COMES 1 PALLET OF WET AND 8 PALLETS OF DRY ( 1 PUPPY 7 ADULT)-- BECAUSE OF THE PUPS, I ASKED PURINA IF WE COULD HAVE 2 PUPPY, 6 ADULT PROPLAN-- NO PROBLEM...
THE OTHER DETAILS YOU NEED TO KNOW FOR THIS STORY IS - WE NEED THE TRACTOR TO UNLOAD TEH DRY FOOD WIHT THE "FORK LIFTS" AS IT IS "TAILGATE DELIVERY" ( THE OTHER KIND OF DELIVERY WITH THE TAILGATE THAT LOWERS PALLET S TO THE GROUND IS "LIFTGATE DELIVERY" AN EXTRA CHARGE AND SHOULD BE SPECIFIED AT PICK UP..)-- THE TRACTOR WIL NOT PICK UP THE WET FOOD PALLET AS IT WEIGHS 1019 POUNDS....THE TRACTOR JUST BARELY PICKS UP THE DRY FOOD WHICH IS 24 BAGS OF 40# EACH= 960--- SO IT IS CLOSE.....
FEDEX CALLED TO ASK IF WE WERE READY TO ACCEPT 2 PALLETS-- I ASSUMED....... THEY MUST BE SENDING 2 WET SO WHEN BUD ASKED IF IT WAS A GOOD TIME TO CHANGE THE HYDRALIC OIL.. I SAID YES...SO HE GOT UNDER IT AND UNDID THE 3 PLUGS WHICH HE READ ABOUT IN THE MANUAL ( HE READS DIRECTIONS)
BIG TRUCK #1 ARRIVED-- THE USUALL DRIVER-- BACKED UP TO THE DOOR-- AND PUT TH EONE PALLET ON THE GROUNDAND WHILE MO SUPERVISED, OUR CREW UNLOADED ONE PALLET AND THEN LEFT--I WAS QUESTIONING THE DRIVER ABOUT THE SECOND PALLET WHEN BIG TRUCK # 2 ARRIVED
THERE WAS AN AWFUL --HS-- MOMENT AS I THOUGHT "HERE 'S 8 PALLETS OF DRY AND WE ARE MINUS TEH TRACTOR"...NOW OUR RECORD FOR DISMANTLING A PALLET OF DRY IS ONE MINUTE 28 SECONDS... BUT THAT IS ONCE IT IS ON THE GROUND. AND WE NEVER HAD DRY ARRIVE "LIFTGATE" ----- IT WAS A SIGH OF RELIEF-- AND THANKS TO GOLDIE---- TO HAVE TRUCK #2 BE FILLING IN FOR TEH USUAL STRIAGHT TRUCK, AND THIS ONE HAD THE ABILITY TO LOWER THE 2 PALLETS WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE THE 2 PUPPY PALLETS.
AT WHICH POINT THE PHONE RANG-- HUGE TRUCK #3 WANTED DELIVERY OF 6 "SKIDS" ON THURSDAY-- BUD SAID TEH OIL WOULD BE CHANGED BY THEN AND TRACTOR USEABLE... SO I SAID YES... SO HERE I SIT TODAY -- READY TO DIRECT THE UNLOADING OF 6 PALLETS OF DRY FOOD FROM TEH HEATED COMFORT OF THE TRACTOR CAB...
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ONE DISASTER AT A TIME ID DO-ABLE.
